Boys at a young age, are taught to respect women, to open
doors for them, to have manners, pull out a chair for her, and over all,
treat her like a princess. And most men follow these lessons right up
until they begin to date a woman. The first couple of dates a man will
court a woman, and just about all women find this incredibly flattering,
they love it, and its often the deciding factor if that man is worthy
of a second third or fourth date.Yet something happens,
after several dates and the relationship has become sexual, the courting
gets less. It may last for several months, but sooner or later, it
begins to decline as the relationship progresses, and before you know
it, the woman in the relationship is now the one that is supposed to be
cooking meals, doing the laundry, and cleaning the house. The chivalry
has died, and the initial attraction often wanes and certain doubts
begin to make, usually the woman, question the status of the
relationship.So how does a woman go from being courted,
doors held open for her, and her needs and desires being attended to….
To suddenly being the cook and cleaner of the house as we see in so many
relationships today? What changed? Where did the chivalry attitude go?
Why isn’t that chivalry attitude always maintained, as a part of
his personality?
By making him wait, as long
as the woman deems
necessary, she decides when sex is possible, which means, he will always
be chivalrous and in courting mode and defer to her. The simplest way
to achieve this to prevent masturbating “cheating” is to put a man in
chastity.
Thanks to FemaleLedUniversity
Chastity
There is nothing sexier than a Woman who
is holding the keys to the promise (no matter how remote) to his sexual
pleasure. She doesn’t have to follow through with that promise; just
give enough encouragement to him that it might be attainable soon.
Men don’t want to be in chastity; they want YOU to put them into
chastity. That small difference means everything! The chastity cage is
the simplest way to ensure that he will conform without little
indiscretions along the way.
The goal here is to make The Lady the object of his sexual desires.
Remove the cock and he becomes just that; less cocky and less sure of
himself because his sexual pleasure is no longer his own destiny to
control. If he knows what is good for him (and believe me, he does) he
now has to defer to the Female who is holding all the high ground, all
the cards, keys and probably his balls in her hand too.
“
Male chastity has an almost magical effect on the temperament of a
man. By deferring his orgasm it makes him focus on the woman, her needs, her feelings, her
priorities. They start to listen, understand, empathize. They start
wanting to help, serve, do things for the women without seeking a
reward! It’s as if the reward for them is in the service itself, in
seeing their women happy, comfortable, less worried, more secure, more
confident.
The theory of energy containment is kind of like a boiling water container. When the water
comes to the boiling point, the resulting steam can be very harmful. But
it can be redirected to a benign function, like powering a locomotive,
for instance, or brewing a delicious cup of coffee. The energy of men
can be and has been very harmful. By handing over control of it to
women, which is what female supremacy is all about, we as a society save
ourselves much agony.”
In
order to get the attention you need you deny him what he loves most of
all, his climax. In the beginning you use his
orgasms as rewards. You train him with orgasms the same way a
dolphin-trainer will slip a fish to a dolphin for doing it’s jump. For
example; after doing the appointed chores to your liking, you
tell him he has been a really good boy and as a reward he will be
allowed to fuck you. You get the idea. Women have been using sex as
rewards for thousands of years. The difference here is that he will know
that it is a reward and that you’ll be doing it continuously with him
wanting it to be this way. He will understand that you own his orgasms.
As the relationship evolves you’ll want to make
it harder and harder for him to get his rewards until you find a cyclus
that suits you. In time, if you succeed, this will
become easier and you won’t have to reward him this way with the same
frequency. He’ll learn to appreciate that the true reward is the
lifestyle itself. PS: Taking away his orgasms doesn’t mean that
you have to limit your own. Feel free to have sex, masturbate or use the
man in any way you want as often as you like as long as you
don’t allow him to climax. Involving him in your pleasure just enhances
the effect of the denial. When you’ve had your
pleasure and you’re completely satisfied, make sure you talk to him
about why he can’t cum reinforcing any of his failings. When he’s
extremely horny, be positive and talk about how you really
appreciate his efforts. This makes the conditioning of
his mind go a lot faster.
Thus The Lady will be empowered,
confident and assured in her leadership.
Domesticate
Once
the woman has her man in chastity; she has the deer in the cross-eyes;
she simply has to start pulling the trigger. The
process of getting the man to accept his new role. It is important
for this power exchange in the relationship. The domestication of the
man to take on chores
important for you both: so you feel “in charge” to unleash the hidden
dominant side and for him to
feel submissive and that giving even without reward is it’s own
pleasure. This can easily be achieved in many ways from daily tasks to a
full body massage or foot-spa, pedicures or any number of tasks.
Discipline and Punishment
Regular
discipline should be used to reinforce his position in the pecking
order and his deference to you in the power exchange. Punishment is
needed when his performance isn’t good enough. You
can punish him in a lot of different ways. From simply prolonging the
period without orgasm to a harsh bare bottom caning. You don’t have to
be a sadist but it helps if you can take pleasure in it. A punishment
helps to correct
his behaviour and the fear of them helps him to intensify his efforts
to please you.
There are a variety of methods other than spanking. For instance, this one is like a harsh spanking and corner
time combined. Cuff him and lock
him spread-eagle on his back on the bed before removing his CB. It is important he knows why he is being
disciplined. Rub a generous
amount of toothpaste or Deepheat onto his cock and balls and leave him for about 30 minutes or stay and watch the performance.
When it comes to discipline, use your imagination and
discuss the alternatives with your man. He needs to know what might
happen and fear it.
Spanked to Crying – Almost always the things that men find
most humiliating they will avoid like the plague so crying has got to be
a number one. Be it from spanking, CBT, or any other way most men will
go out of their way not to cry. Their ego demands it.
The act of bending over,
assuming a certain position or having to take down clothing is full of
embarrassment enough to be followed by the blushing and flushing of both
sets of cheeks. Crying from being spanked is a goal for some
Dominants and submissives alike and though very humiliating afterwards at the time they are
past caring whether their ego has been crushed, having been cleansed and relieved.
CBT
– This is can only ever be interpreted as an attack on a
man’s masculinity whether in play, punishment or pleasure giving, so as
such ranks highly in the deference hit parade (sorry about the pun).
Ball tampering: punching, kicking, squeezing all have varying degrees
which can range from pleasurable to downright painful but are guaranteed
to get his attention. This reinforces his inferiority to the Female of
the species who of course isn’t so vulnerable to leave her prime assets
in the line of fire even though they are really stronger than they look.
As such this is probably the perfect punishment
for inattentiveness or failing to come up to standard as are the use of a
dog shock collar around testes and nettles, toothpaste etc. Any of
these coupled with an ruined orgasm or oral servitude ramps up the
humiliation.
Similarly slaves of old would always be under
the threat, real or imaginary, of emasculation. A man is like a
squirrel; will do anything to hang onto his nuts! Of course their
Mistress’s wouldn’t sully
themselves with such trivia, they would have a man or women with a sharp
blade for that purpose but today just the threat of such, accompanied
by a little squeezing and wrenching ought to provide the desired result.
“When you have them by the balls, their hearts and minds easily follow.” – British Army
Chaste Pleasuring
– Wearing a Strap-on while being locked
in chastity or a face dildo. This act of giving sexual
pleasure while being denied is one of the oldest, having been performed
in harems around the world by eunuchs for centuries. Performing all the
usual
duties of a man without any of the benefits might be the ultimate
head-fuck but is also a selfless act; this one really is all about the
pleasure of the woman and the fact; like chastity, he is being
controlled.
A warning here this isn’t for everyone’s taste; some women don’t like hard synthetics in their vaginas and some men will gag on the end. You pays your money and takes your choice.
Facesitting or PussyWorship
is one of the ultimate deferences a man can bestow upon a woman. The act of going down on her or being pinned beneath her
puts
him firmly in his place on the food chain (sorry).
Yes, on the face of it (Ooops)
whilst
serving the pussy the slave may also take pleasure but is
placed in about as submissive a pose as one can get and forced to carry
out his lip-service duties while also trying to breathe. His humility is
absolute and if this includes anal his subjugation is ramped up. A
little breath-play here also reaffirms who is really in charge.
Strap-on Worship
A
naked woman standing before a man on his knees has got his attention.
At eye level with her vagina he is like a fly in a spiders web and can
be left in no doubt that her pleasure will take preference. That holds
true also if that lady is wearing a strap-on. It is not the
phallus or the fact that she shouldn’t have one that is the turn on but
the woman on top that is the driver of
desire. The penis is the perceived symbol of power, yet suddenly
here is woman wielding
that power. The role reversal is humiliating and yet beguiling; that is
the ultimate drug. The
physical act itself of putting mouth to phallus might be sexually
exciting too if able to overcome the
deep embarrassment of emasculation by giving him the female role. The
dubious pleasure the Female might feel, if any, would be of power and
control where once again he is postponing his pleasure on her whim.
Strap-on Anal
The taboo of taboos. This has got to be one of the most deferential and humiliating things a
guy could for a woman. Everything to do with the use of a strap-on is the
reverse of all he has become familiar with and is going against his
teaching, genetics, etc.
When it
comes to being physically taken by a woman there is an obvious bonding
with a mental adjustment that would probably be irreversible and
possibly humiliating, which is all part of the subjugation. Depending on
her mood or how her slave has been performing she might determine
whether she goes easy on him or chooses to destroy him. Complete
deference to his Woman would be achieved if he would actually orgasm
from this coitus by anal stimulation.
The whole ritual build up of anal cleansing would also have it’s own
displacing of the male ego.
To Cum or Not to Cum – That is the question. What guy doesn’t like to be edged to orgasm but then being denied. This
is where She is reaffirming that it is The Female in charge. But to be thrown
back in the cage would be very frustrating and very embarrassing especially
after being made to plead to cum and then been denied. Begging to be
allowed to cum takes a man out of his comfort zone, reaffirming her place in the hierarchy.
Your sub needs to cum and he will do anything to cum. You will allow
him to cum on occasion but you will also slowly take away his right to
have that pleasure. Ruin his orgasms often and make him thank you. In
time you could easily have him pleasure-less and without actual orgasms,
up to you. Remember, an orgasm is not a right. It is not a reward either. Yours are important and the only
orgasms that should be cherished.
Whatever happens a man
should be in no doubt whether he is permitted to orgasm. Always make him
ask permission to cum! That is the ultimate deference to his Domina.
By
learning the art of Tantric sex the man will learn to defer his orgasm
altogether for their mutual benefit. Or the couple could choose Karezza
methods where Ladies cum, guys don’t, unless given permission on rare
occasion.
With
all these things in her arsenal the Lady will be inspired by her
new-found powers of control and persuasion. She always had these womanly
wiles but now she is able to channel them to her advantage.
She
is confident and honoured in being given the privilege of leading his
submission and nurturing its growth. She will be humbled and dutiful to
the responsibility
and trust which has been placed upon her, and she will graciously accept
and cherish that
which is freely given and that which she takes.
So the first script I wrote was about the idea of using a penis extender. Now if you happen to have one of those instead of a strap on then you can still find that version, here
If you haven’t invested in a strap on or penis extender then tonight’s just freestyle for you – maybe do something again from the last three weeks you enjoyed most, or just do what you fancy!
The idea with this is mostly just to read it and get some inspiration on the kinds of things you can do and say, rather than just acting it out.
“So sweetheart, now your cock is all locked up so much I have to admit, I’ve been missing something. We haven’t been fucking enough. No no, don’t get excited, we’ve locked you up, and you aren’t going to be coming out.
It’s time to use that strap on we bought. Let’s get it on you… That’s it, nice and secure. Is that all comfy honey? Oh look, it’s big isn’t it! I like how that looks.
Is it frustrating honey, if I stroke it like this, while your cock is locked up in that little cage? Wouldn’t this feel so good on your real cock? I like this, it’s so firm, so big.
How about if I kiss it, suck it? Mmm, oh baby you’re getting all hard, well trying… That’s so cute.
Wow, it feels big in my mouth. I guess I’m just not used to something this size. What do you think, do you like how it looks, do you wish you could get this hard, this.. big?
“It’s not huge, darling. From what I read it’s really quite normal. And honestly compared to all those posts you show me on Tumblr, it’s small if anything. Just, not compared to, you, you know?
“No don’t get upset, it’s just a toy baby, I like your cock, I really do, but ever since you showed me those pictures I keep imagining what it would feel like to have something, bigger. I kind of wonder, you know, if… it might even make me cum?
"Yes honey, I know you make me cum, and I love that, but you don’t when we actually have sex, do you? You have to use your fingers, or our vibe or, well now more than ever, your tongue. But I keep wondering, maybe it’s not me… maybe I just need something bigger than your little cock.
"Sweetie, it’s just a toy! If you held it in your hand you’d be okay. But this one fits on this belt, it’s great. It leaves your hands free for other things. Or like now, you don’t even need them!
"No, I don’t even have to unlock you, look at this, see, it fits right above your caged cock, isn’t that amazing! God baby, look how big it is! It’s like it’s yours now! You always wanted to be this big didn’t you! How’s it feel to look down and see that beautiful big cock between your legs? Isn’t it the perfect gift, for us both!
"Do you like it when I go down and suck on it honey, is that okay? Oh god darling, look, I have to stretch my mouth open to even ummmpfffhhh. Ugrghff mmmpffh ffo uud.
"Oh my god, did you see that? I just slid it down my throat! I think the problem before was yours didn’t really, get to my throat darling! As soon as I got it past the back of my mouth I almost didn’t need to gag at all! Wow, now I feel better about it! I love this thing! Umm, is it, okay if? Oh of course it is, I want it in me baby, okay?
“Just take it slow, it’s bigger than I’m used to. That’s it, mmm, just work the tip in and out.
“Is this frustrating baby? At least it means you won’t cum before I’m done! No more quick squirts huh? It’s okay, you can put your frustration into fucking me harder, but, build up slowly. Did I say how big it is?
"Oh wow, it’s so big! Oh my god, can you see it stretching me! Oh that’s so intense. I, oh my god, this is AMAZING, and that’s just the tip! I, I… oh my God, it’s reached my g-spot, oh god I think, hold on. Oh shit I nearly came! I can’t believe it! Could you see how close that was, I’m shaking already! Ssshh, be quiet honey, I need to concentrate. Just slowly fuck me.
"Oh fuck oh fuuuuuck! I’ve never had anything this deep, it’s incredible. Is there more, can you see baby? Oh my god, I can feel it sliding past my cervix I think. You never even reached that. That’s.. kind of weird but oh, I think I like it and yes, I can feel it even deeper, oh my god it’s.. I can’t even describe it. Look how deep it is! Oh I have to fuck it now, help me baby, fuck me! Yes, oh my god, oh my GOD. Fuck me, harder, yes I feel, oh shit, it feels so good, don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t…
"OH FUCK YES I’M CUMMING ON YOUR HUGE COCK BABY! Fuck me, fuck me, yes yes yes yeeeeees! I’m still cumming, I can’t hold it in, I’m, oh shit I’m going to pee I’m… oh my god I’m squirting! It feels so good, keep fucking me, don’t stop! Don’t ever stop!
"Oh baby that… that was the most incredible thing I’ve ever felt! It’s okay baby, I’m crying because I’m happy. I just never knew anything could feel that good. Mmmm thank you darling, just hold me, okay? I love you so much.
"Oh it feels so big in me, just.. oh yes, just move it like that again. Are you horny baby, is your dick all squashed up in the cage. Fuck me with it, yes oh my god, don’t stop, I’m going to cum again, oh yes, yes, YES!
"Holy shit darling, I just came twice, and you haven’t even touched my clit! Can you believe it? This is incredible. Can we just stay like this all night?’
“Oh baby, now we’ve got this strap on we really don’t have much reason to get you out of that little cage any more, do we?
So, tonight you’re probably going for some kind of extended lock up, whether that’s a complete lock-up to the end of the month, or a strict one where he’s only allowed out when restrained or for short edging or tasks.
So tonight let’s enjoy some quality time with his cock before it gets locked away again!
It’s Friday night so it might be fun to have some drinks and dress up in something sexy for him for this. Overdo the lipstick a bit, it’s going to end up all over his cock anyway…
If you haven’t done much tying him up then tonight’s going to be a good one for that. So tell him to warm you up, then once you’re ready, get him naked and restrained, cage still on.
You could put some videos on, I found a great selection of one of our favourite videos makers which is just really hot hand and blow jobs:
There are LOADS here, so go through the pages, some have ruins at the end which is brilliant!
So at this point he’s still caged so have some fun playing and licking his caged cock, see if you can make him beg!
Watch the videos together, talk about how big the guy’s cock is, make some comparisons, maybe talk about how hot the girls are (even if you don’t have a lesbian bone in your body, implying you’d ‘do her’ is one of the hottest teases, trust me!). It can be as simple as saying how cute a girl is, or just wondering out loud ‘I wonder what it’d be like to be with her?’ If you have any lesbian fantasies, share them now, or even better, confessions (most of us kissed a girlfriend at some point, right, that wasn’t just me? lol)
So the other reason I wanted to highlight these videos is the position most of the women are in, which is lying down between his legs. Try to copy that.
If your bed isn’t huge then lying across it diagonally helps!
Then finally unlock him, and start to play. Really take your time. Remind him that he’s going to be locked away, talk about how long it is. Tease it might even be longer if you really like it.
It’s really hot to get a vibe and use it while you play with him. Sometimes just ignore his cock to focus on yourself, just gripping onto him hard.
A few times I’ve deliberately told him to be quiet when he started talking at moments like that, omg it was so fucking sexy! I know, something as simple as that.
If you have a gag you could even put it on him, or shove your panties in his mouth. Just do it for fun, it’s super hot, they’ll love it!
Tell him about the things you’re going to make him do when he’s locked up,
As they get more aroused it’s time to give them a warning:
‘You are not going to cum tonight, if you cum I’m going to ruin it and you will not get out for the rest of the month, is that clear?!
This is the thing with threats like that, you’re making them as part of the game. It doesn’t matter if you stick to it or not over the next week. The threat is just to turn him on even more, and it REALLY works. Trust me, try it!
So now, really it’s up to you what else you want to try. My objective while I lie between his legs will be to get him ‘weeping’ precum.
This comes from a combination of extended teasing, but also it’s build up in the shaft of his cock, so deliberately just stimulate the tip or frenulum for a while and then push up his cock with your fingers around it to squeeze a nice amout of it out and make it weep:.
Once I get to that point there are a few options, some of which are probably a bit of a pushing your boundaries a bit but that’s the whole point of this month, right?
Here is a list of five ideas for you to choose from (or try them all!):
Firstly, face sitting. My huge tip with this is if you’re not comfortable doing it because you worry about ‘the view’ PUT A BLINDFOLD ON HIM! I do almost every time, it just relaxes me about it all and lets me go for it.
What it does is put you in a wonderful position to play with him with your mouth or hand while he enjoys, and you enjoy, him licking you intimately. This of course is the classic 69 position if you lay down flat, and I love to do that, lay down so I can kiss and gently suck his cock while he really goes for it and makes me cum.
Beyond that, while you’re in that position, be brave, press your pussy on his face, let him lick all of it, and yes, shift forward a little and let him lick your bottom too. He will ADORE IT. And it feels AMAZING.
Even better if you grab a vibe and use it while he does that, it’s incredible.
Okay, so second suggestion is cock grinding, straddling him cowgirl style, but with his cock between your pussy lips, not in you, and just riding forwards and back.
Add lots of lube for fun and a vibe so you can cum while doing it, again, totally awesome. Just don’t get carried away and make him squirt, that’s the danger in this position.
Third, fuck him, we haven’t done enough of that this month! Get his cock in you and enjoy it, but again, don’t let him cum! But you use a vibe,and you can! Just be careful, if he’s close, you cumming with his cock in you might make you squeeze on him hard enough to take him over. Just watch for his reaction…
Fourthly, for mean twist, if you have a strap on, put it on him, tell him you need something bigger… and let him watch you fuck it while his cock strains helplessly below it.
This is obviously a good moment for some cock size teasing. Tell him how good it feels, how much bigger it is than him, that you can just keep him caged, that you love big cocks now, just, if he’s into it he’ll LOVE all that.
And finally, as a last mind blowing tease, add a bit of anal while you’re up there. Now maybe you do it lots, in which case just go for it cowgirl style. Maybe you’ve not done it at all, in which case simply grinding up and down so the tip of his lubed cock rubs against your bottom may be all you need to do. A bit like this but the other way around:
That actually feels wonderful, but the biggest thing, is you need to tell him. He isn’t sure where his cock is, but you can say stuff like this:
‘Do you know where your cock is right now? Pressing against my arsehole… that, feels nice you know.
‘How’d you think it would feel, pushing in that tight little hole, would you like that?
‘Do you want to fuck me in the arse, baby?
You can reach around and push him harder against it too, or add more lube and use your hand and bottom and butt cheeks to tease him.
If you’ve not done anal much or at all, this will probably count as one of the hottest things you’ve ever done for him, if my experience is anything to go by. So let me encourage you, if that’s all you do, give that a go, for him.
Beyond that… well if you feel like it, you can push his cock head harder against you with your fingers,and see if you can get the tip of him in. Read up on my anal article if you want to try this and don’t have much experience.
Let me warn you now, the emotional and physical mix of all this, especially if anal is something he longs for, might just take him over into orgasm really easily.
I’d be torn about what to do. If this is a huge deal for him, I’d let him cum. I wouldn’t move, so it’s effectively a ruin, but it’ll be such a rush for him to cum there, I’d let it happen.
Of course, you want to add a soft rebuke, ‘Are you cumming in my arse?! You are so naughty. I warned you what would happen if you came!’ Then if you liked it at all you could add, ‘That was kinda hot, shame your cock’s locked up so much, I could maybe get into anal…’ (He heh I’m so mean).
And once he’s done, gently slide off him and leave him, mind blown, while you go clear up. The easiest way, literally just go to the loo, I won’t go into any more detail but it’s actually a very easy clean up compared to him cumming in your pussy.
When you’re back, give him a wipe with a wet wipe and cage him back up. Get him untied ASAP, and have a big cuddle.
If you manage this without him cumming (now I wrote it I think I want him to cum lol!!!) then well done, that’s it I think, and wow, what a night to remember.
Again, give him a wipe, lube up the cage, and lock it back on before you let him out if you can.
Please note, I think that in this scenario, YOU should put the cage on and lock it if you possibly can. In reality I get him to do this most of the time but especially when starting an extended lock up, or during this week when it’s ‘strict’ rules, I’ll be doing it as much as possible. It’s just a huge turn on for them, that’s the bottom line. Again and again I hear how much they love that simple little step.
If you can’t get it on them, it’s fine to get their help, for example I can’t get the ring on hubby (but I leave it on for sessions like this mostly as a cock ring) but I’ll do whatever I can, even if it’s just the final click of the lock.
If you need any more attention, make sure you get it! And then snuggle up and before you go to sleep, tell him he’s to wake you up by going down on you. Seriously, just try it, make him set an alarm, and enjoy a Saturday morning orgasm wake up! it’s going to be a fun ten days!
So, today you need to talk to each other because you have a decision to make. Tomorrow marks ten days until the end of the Locktober.
Depending on how you found the five-day lock up you can decide just how you want to handle those ten days. I can think of three options:
Another complete lock up with no release for the full ten days
A ‘strict lock up’ which means he’s in the cage except for when you occasionally want him out at night to edge or play with him – and most (or all) of those he should be restrained.
A relaxed denial where he’s caged some of the time but it’s pretty casual
For those new to this the last option is totally fine! I think we’ll be going for the second option. But whichever you go for, talk it through and discuss why, it’s good to communicate!.
Now a possible twist might be that you offer different rewards for each option if he picks them… for example to go full lock up he might get a ruin, for the strict option, a few edges, and for the easy option, well he just gets to go down on you tonight!
Also take the opportunity to talk about what’s been good, and maybe there are things you want to try in these last ten days that it’s worth discussing now, and that might even require toys bought now so you can try it. It can all get a bit freestyle from here!
Although most males are truly unaware of It, a man is much more obedient, kind, nurturing and generous with his woman when he is “wanting orgasm”, rather than after he’s had one. This is due to the unconscious neurochemistry of his male mind. The wasted sexual energy, lull of desire, attentiveness and lack of obedience after a male orgasm can be severe in many men and unfortunately can last for days or even weeks. There are ways to shorten this undesirable time frame, but the easiest remedy, is to harness and reduce his explosive orgasms on a routine and regular basis…
Seriously, It’s not enough ladies, to just not let him climax!
Most males can go a long time before sufficient healthy desire returnsand builds up enough for “Femdom Training” purposes. FLR (Female Led Relationships) keep the passion and desire fully alive…
That’s where teasing and edging come in ladies. Giving him a lot of sexual attention and making him rock hard (daily), without letting him climax, is a sure way to get him properly back on track and under your total feminine spell…
Practice your blowjob skills or lay in bed with him, perfecting your fondling skills. Make a science of bringing him right to the very edge of an eruption and then stopping all stimulation. Make a game of It, by giving him frequent breaks only to continue again and again and again. Believe me, you will have his full attention. In fact, while you’re stroking and edging him, calmly talk to him about what you desire and all the plans you have. Tell him frequently where his new training is going (tell him you don’t want him to cum) and then how you want to remodel the bedroom or living room as you’re gently and carefully playing with his control stick. Whatever the subject you’re speaking about, be assured, he will be all ears.
The more his orgasmic ejaculations are harnessed, managed and controlled, the more he will accept his orgasms being controlled… It’s called Neurochemistry… It’s like a Snowball, the woman just has to start the training process and mother nature will indeed lead the male to seek more arousal drugs (dopamine) in his brain, by covertly programming his mind and delaying his orgasm further and further…
Allowing a male to cum, is like purposefully letting the air out of your cars tire…
A nice simple one for today, after the intensity of the post orgasm torture yesterday!
Today’s a taste of how chastity play works for us, on a normal day. When we aren’t trying something new, it’s not a date night, there’s no new toy to try out. So, just a regular evening!
Firstly what’s noteworthy is, he’s there in bed, not up watching some sport or movie or playing some game! Oh yes, that cage around his cock is very good at getting him to bed right on time!
And so, assuming he’s been caged all day, we’d cuddle up in bed. If we’ve sent each other some tumblr posts we’d browse through those (so if you haven’t got that secret shared tumblr sorted yet, do that!).
Then it would vary a little. I’ve really got into this ‘warm me up’ concept a lot during Locktober, so him going down on me before I let him out of his cage is probably going to be on the agenda.
While he’s down there I have a decision to make. Do I just let him pleasure me and make me cum, and not let him out at all, or do I edge him tonight? It used to almost always be the latter. Now I think, I go for just be about a third of the time and it’s hot every time!
I’ll cum, usually two or three times, and just say, ‘thanks baby, that’s all for tonight’ and besides his horny little frustrated groans, that’s it!
But still the majority of the time I’ll get him to come back up before I orgasm, and unlock his cock. I tend to let him rub or vibe me as I grab his growing cock and he kisses my breasts. Maybe I’ll push him back down, because, that’s very, very hot, but mostly I’ll just cum like that, and then it’s my turn to edge him. With my mouth if I fancy it, mostly with my hand and some good lube.
Five or ten minutes of that he’s got to the edge once or twice, and that’s it, I stop!
Give him five minutes for his cock to go down and then it’s cage back on (or leave it off for the night for a break) and we’re done.
Sometimes it’s shorter, sometimes longer. Sometimes it’s nothing at all because I’m just too tired or not in the mood.
As long as you make it deliberate, and not just ignoring him, you can even turn your ‘not tonights’ into something sexy.
So try it tonight, a ‘normal’ night of chastity, and see how you like it!
Sooo, new to Locktober, and very mean one tonight…Post Orgasm Torture!
Post orgasm torture sounds a bit crazy but all it means is that once your man ejaculates, you keep stimulating him, yes, even though he’s gone super sensitive.
Again because we’re in Locktober we’re not even going to give him the pleasure of full orgasm, but simply ruin his orgasm, and then go back to wanking him after the pleasure is gone but he’s super sensitive!
We don’t do this often and I usually end up laughing as I do it as much as it being sexy, but, it’s a fun twist on NOT letting him cum, and as I suggest below, telling him if he cums before you say he can, that you’ll ruin it and then keep rubbing is, well it’s a huge hot mindfuck, that’s what it is!
HE HAS TO BE TIED DOWN! Or well, you can sit on his legs but seriously, don’t do this unless he’s restrained, hands and legs.
I’m not kidding. You will get thrown across the room.
But that intensity is so hot!
But yeah, arms tied tight, and legs too or you need to be sitting on them really firmly or well out of the way of them.
They seem to like using clingfilm for it in the videos!
I also find sitting on his tummy quite fun, it really keeps him pinned down and his cock is easier to torment when it’s all I’m focused on, so that’s worth a try too.
How to do it
Giving a hand job or blow job or good old combination of the two.
And then I tell him I’m going to do it, when he’s really close, that I’m not going to stop, that I’m going to keep on wanking him even after he’s cum – sometimes he kind of likes the idea, he won’t soon, trust me. Other times he starts begging me not to, I like that.
What can be very hot is do it as a threat. ‘If you cum before I say you can I’m going to ruin it then go back to rubbing you with your cum!’ And then just keep saying no until he goes over ‘without permission’ and use that as the excuse to ruin it and then torture him. SO hot!
Basically as he cums, just pause to ruin it, enjoy his desperate little moans!
I love to use his cum as the new lube, so I’ll put my hand over the top and make it fall right back down, and then I just go for it. He says there’s nothing like it he’s ever experienced, and he hates it and loves it all at once.
So yeah, keep wanking him, it’s all about the head of his cock, the rest not so much. Give it a good minute or two if you like to hear him beg, or just 20 seconds to give him a shock.
If you really want to go for it, try keeping going and see if you can ruin him again!
And of course, climb on! Why not fuck him while he’s writhing around… it’s quite funny, not very sexy though.
My favourite video of it has disappeared but a quick search will find lots of them, here’s a few I found:
If you have kids like us, you seriously might need to gag him! lol
I’ve told him I’m going to make him take Viagra and do this all evening one time – ‘no you’re fucking not!’ he replied. But it’s amazing what he’ll agree to get that cage off his cock!
I hope you enjoyed your weekend! Pampering, teasing and then ideally some of you managed to make them cum in their cages! If you haven’t checked in on how horny that’s left them, it’s definitely worth a text. ‘How horny are you now baby? You realise this means I don’t ever have to take you out?’ LOL
Okay, so firstly, if you did make them cum in their cage, and left them in… well you may want to take them out. Then again, you may not! It’s totally up to you at this point. If you’ve been doing even half of the stuff so far you’ll be starting to get an idea of what excites you most, so just trust your instinct and decide if you prefer to leave them locked up or get them out to play with them tonight.
All of this chastity journey started with hubby and I looking at sex toys together last year, and him suggesting it might be fun to try a cock cage. So, we love sex toys.
We’ve had then in various forms from before we were married. He bought me my first vibrator as a birthday present (I know, what a romantic!), and well we’ve built up quite the collection!
Tonight there are three things we’re going to do, not all of them might apply.
Firstly, I’m going to encourage you to go through your toy, if you have some. Have a look at what you have and maybe pick out some you haven’t used for a while to try out!
Secondly I’d like you to do what we do, browse some sex toys online and see if there’s anything you should be getting.
Lastly I’ll give you some specific heads up on toys you might want to get for chastity play, for Locktober and beyond.
Mostly when we recommend toys we also add a link to Lovehoney (except some cages which we like but they don’t sell). We do benefit from an affiliate link with them but we’d recommend them regardless. They’re they only toy store we’ve ever used I think, apart from maybe some random Anne Summers purchases!
The main reason we recommend them is the amazing fact that they offer free returns, no questions asked, for a whole year after you buy from them! For us that’s a great thing as it means we can recommend stuff and if you don’t like it, well, no problem, just send it back! But also it means you can try things if you’re not sure about it, and just return it, used, yes used! To them if you don’t like it. They even include the returns label in the box!
Also,everything is very discreet, the packaging is plain, the credit card bill is just LH Trading or something like that, and while you can deal with them online, actually their customer service team are SO lovely.
Anyway, back to the plan!
Something Old
So have a look through your toys, relive some memories, and take some time to have some fun. It may be some new ones you want to use (I’m think our King Cock might be making an appearance!) or perhaps look back at the oldest ones you have. (Also, toys do die over time, if a toy’s got all manky, just throw it out and make some space!).
So perhaps you could pick a favourite toy each to play with, or maybe there’s some you’ve bought but never used, get them out now and, at the very least, TALK about them, why you got them in the first place, why you haven’t used them, and whether you should try them, now, or another time!
Something new
So, another fun activity is heading over to Lovehoney and just browsing different departments! As with all I recommend, try to do this in a completely positive way, no silly reactions to things your partner might be curious about. Laughing is great, pulling a face and looking disgusted, not so good! It’s just like fantasies, they are just curious, and wondering if you are curious too. So have an explore, laugh or scream at some of the crazy toys there are out there! Maybe even decide to try some! It’s so much easier when you realise you’re just trying them out and can send them back for free if you don’t like it.
Their special offers pages are always worth a look and they always have a Deal of the Day with an extra large discount.
The two for 25 is always a great place to bag a bargain in my experience, and the 3 for 10 deal are lots of cheap fun things, but handy for getting over the free delivery threshold!
Something borrowed, something blue?
Hmm,well maybe not, although the strap on I recommend is purple… And that’s what this section is. Some of the specific toys we’ve found most helpful for our chastity play together. Our personal recommendations and ones that you’d benefit from having if you’re enjoying this journey and are willing to try being a bit kinkier!
Lube
Lube, you need lube. If you don’t think you do, you’re wrong!
Lube for toys, especially butt plugs and big dildos, sure but we use by far the most for putting on him when edging him, and also for lubricating the cage.
Best lube for handjobs and edging – Silicon Lubes (they are crazy slippery and last for ages
Silicon lubes are also best for applying to your age as they don’t react if it’s a plastic one and they stay slippery all night or all day.
Do NOT use water based lubes for these purposes, they just dry out and go sticky! Water based lubes are only really good for dildos/strap ons etc where they will be going in the woman as her natural lubrication keeps them from going sticky. Oh and for blowjobs, as they can be flavoured.
Vibrators
You either want small and powerful – ideally rechargable like these great Rocks Off brand ones.
Or you want to go big and SUPER powerful, as with these wand type mains powered vibes. Don’t buy the classic Hitachi Wand though, it only has two, way too strong, power levels, try one of these instead.
Finally our most expensive, but very cool, vibrator is the WeVibe. This is just for me, and is a clever shape that goes on my clitoris and my g-spot at the same time. You can use it alone or during love making to add pressure and vibrations to your g-spot (feels amazing). But, the best feature… is it’s remote controlled, from ANYWHERE! So hubby can use the phone app to turn it on and off and change the patterns.
To say it’s useful for phone sex is something of an understatement. A friend told me they are all the rage in the armed forces for tours of duty apart, to the extent they tell each other they better get a We-vibe if they want to keep their woman!!!! lol
We both like using these, but most designs are rubbish and painful to wear! Our favourite by far are these RollPlay ones with a ball inside that silently rolls around and keeps you aware you’re wearing it.
We haven’t dared try the large, medium and small do us fine!
For chastity play, they help keep him aroused and act like a catalyst for horniness in our experience.
He likes to make me wear them out to dinners so we have the shared secret of being naughty together. I have yet to make him wear one to a dinner but now I think of it…
Specific plugs to massage or stimulate the prostate are also interesting and in combination with a vibrator, as some of you may have found last night, can produce explosive results!
Restraints
Covered this before in Locktober but under the bed restraints make light bondage an instant option. Nice comfy velcro strap make it a breeze to get either of us in or out of them, and tucked away out of sight with no hassle. A permanent fixture on our bed!
Strap ons
I’ve written at length about Why I Love our Strap-on – but in short, it’s a brilliant toy to combine with him being caged. He can wear it above his caged cock and so you can still have, much extended, love making sessions but he’s super horny and doesn’t cum, leave a mess in your or run out of libido until you are well and truly done.
I know, it sounds crazy kinky but this is so damn hot.
And of course, for the brave, the woman can wear it and use it on him for ‘pegging’. We’ll talk about this more but, if he’s really into chastity play already, it’s very, very VERY likely he’d at least gets turned on by the idea.
I wasn’t at all eager when he brought it up at first but actually, unlike all the silly captions, it can be very sensual indeed, and it’s genuinely how men are wired. They have a prostate gland that means they can cum from anal. Us women don’t! Seems a waste to not even try it…
The dildo that comes with the above recommended strap on is PERFECT for pegging if you are ever going to try it.
Leaving the best to last
Now my favourite toy, well, at least tied with my vibrators, is our King Cock Extra Girthy Dildo. It’s big, it’s really big, not crazy big but, yeah… And it looks and feels AMAZING.
I was scared the first time we opened this, but when I’m relaxed and ready, and it’s lubed, whether I used it, or he does, or he puts it on our strap on (because it is designed to easily go onto the one we recommended above) – it is mind blowing.
I hope that’s been useful and not JUST sounded like some big sales pitch. Please feel free to visit Lovehoney or your favourite store directly if you object to us using affiliate links, we don’t make much off it but it all helps me justify the time I spend on this blog to hubby!
Either way, we live in a wonderful age where we have all these fun toys to enhance our sex life. Wherever you are with your exploration, I hope we have encouraged you to go a little further and have more fun together!
So, four nights, five days locked up. Start tonight asking them how it’s been, talk about what’s good, what’s bad about it compared to what else you’ve done.
And then, ask them, ‘How would it be if I didn’t let you out?’ and see how that discussion goes, be honest, if you’ve even considered it, tell them, they’ll find that VERY hot.
Then announce that you want to reward them with a ruined orgasm for doing the five days, they’ll be excited at the thought of getting out, and then, add…’While you’re still caged’
Because that’s the task today, to see if you can make them spurt while still caged!
Just like that…
Now this isn’t easy, but it’s sure fun to try! We’ve managed it the three main ways I can think of, so I’ll quickly set out each and you can see which suits you.
I suggest you get him to edge you first if you need a bit of encouragement to go for this… maybe not cumming unless you manage to make him cum too. And yes, when I say cum, I mean ruin 🙂
Caged Cumming option 1
First to try is by playing with his cock in the cage, pulling, licking, rubbing, but most of all putting a vibrator, ideally a big powerful wand vibe against the cage.
Sometimes with the vibe you just ‘hit the spot’ and it’s quite easy to take them over, other times we’ve found we just can’t get it.
Unlike that picture though, be sure to pull away the vibe as soon as he goes over. We don’t want him having anything but a ruin today, but even that will feel great compared to the lack of stimulation he’s had.
If this is the approach you’re taking, well if you fail you then have the option to say, ‘oh well, if you came I was going to let you out but I think we’ll try again tomorrow, so we’ll just keep you locked up.’
Of course if you succeed, you have the counter argument, ‘Oh well if you can cum in the cage there’s no reason to let you out!’
He he.
Even if you plan to let them out… you should tease them with those, as they’re really pretty hot. And the ‘you may have thought you were coming out but you’re not’ appears to be one of the biggest turn-ons in this game (if we believe the captions anyway).
Option 2
Option 2 involves a butt plug, and ideally one designed to hit the prostate – often called a prostate massager. Now the idea with these is men can actually learn to just cum from exercising their pelvic floor muscles. We’ve never managed that although many say they have. For us, the answer is… whack the big vibrator on it! It works like magic!
Lots of lube, get the plug in him, lie him on his side, and slowly turn up the speed while pressing the wand on the base of the plug. Keep talking, get his feedback, play with his caged cock and nipples, but most of all have fun listening to the noises he makes! This can take time, half an hour of building it up of more, but it’s totaly worth it.
I know lots of you struggle with the whole plug and anal thing but, there is something absolutely extraordinary in teaching a guy he can cum without his cock being involved. It’s a genuine game changer in him realising there is more to sex than just sticking his cock somewhere!
Option 3
Option 3 is pegging or a dildo for prostate massage. Just so you can see it’s for real…
If you’re not new to this you’ll know what to do anyway, if you are new, now’s not the time to start! But if you’re brave enough we are going to try it later in the month. He would probably love this, so be open to it. I was resistant to it too but turns out it can be very sensual and sexy. It’s one of the things I save for special moments.
NO MATTER WHICH OPTION YOU PICK YOU RUIN THE ORGASM! This is easier with option 1, prostate orgasms tend to be different anyway, but once he starts spurting, stop the stimulation. Just because you can and we don’t want any full orgasms before the end of the month!
And then, well see what you fancy, keep him caged or let him out… your choice.
nfrdm 