Part of teasing and edging my husband involves learning exactly where his edge is – learning exactly when to stop, so he is as close as humanly possible to orgasm, just one deliciously agonizing breath away, without actually climaxing. I carefully take him to that edge, then remove all stimulation for a few seconds, let him barely begin to calm down, then I take his cock and do it again. And again. And again…
It is perfectly natural to make mistakes during this process. In the perpetual challenge to edge my husband as intensely as possible, sometimes I misjudge his limit and accidentally send him over. Honestly, if you are exploring edging with your man, and you don’t accidentally make him cum sometimes (especially at first) then you aren’t edging him hard enough. In my humble opinion, you can never find a man’s true limit without crossing it sometimes. You need to learn the exquisite sequence of groans, twitches, and muscle contractions unique to your man that signal his imminent orgasm. Once you learn that sequence, and the EXACT spot in that sequence that marks his point-of-no-return, you can shatter him with deliciously pleasurable, toe-curling, mind-bending edges, over and over again, by stopping at EXACTLY the last possible moment in his sequence.
Getting that close – experiencing that much pleasure – is something he can’t physically do for himself, because the male brain loses conscious control long before that moment. Purely for illustration, let’s say your man’s preorgasmic sequence goes A-B-C-D-E-F. Let’s say his point-of-no-return is E. If he hits E, his orgasm reflex kicks in and he’s going to cum whether you keep touching him or not. So, to give your man maximum pleasure and totally blow his mind, you want to take him exactly to D and stop – over and over again, as many times as possible. The beautiful truth is that he needs you to do that for him; it is physically impossible for him to do it for himself. He can probably take himself to B, which is still intensely pleasurable, but once he hits C, his brain shuts off, instinct kicks in, and he cascades through D-E-F like a waterfall. Effectively, when it’s in his control, his point-of-no-return is C and his capacity for pleasure is limited to B. But, when you take control, you can take him all the way to D (a vastly more intense edge) over and over again!
How does it feel to know that he needs you in order to achieve pleasure he simply cannot achieve on his own?
How insane do you think it makes him feel, when you give him pleasure he’s literally never experienced before, because it was impossible without you?
So, if you want to achieve such extraordinary mastery of your man’s orgasm reflex, naturally mistakes will happen. You’re going to accidentally hit point E a couple times. The important thing to remember (for both of you) is that these mistakes are not failures – they are an essential part of the learning experience! Do not get angry with yourself or your man. Do not punish him for cumming (unless that’s part of your game).
Embrace your mistake!
Kiss him deeply while he cums in your hands. Pet his writhing body with your free hand. (My husband likes it when I claw him with my nails during his orgasm) Tell him how sexy he is – how sexy he looks when he cums. Tell him how impressed you were with his stamina, regardless of how long he actually lasted. Admire his orgasm. (“Wow! Good one! Keep going, baby!”) It’s okay to briefly apologize for sending him over the edge (“Oops! Shit, sorry baby!”) but don’t dwell on the fact you made a mistake. Just kiss and stroke him through his full orgasm. You can analyze the mistake later.
No matter how experienced you are, mistakes will still happen. I’ve edged my husband… ummm… thousands? of times. I have no idea. At least thousands. And I still make mistakes. In my neverending pursuit of that perfect, razor-close edge, I still push it too far and hit point E sometimes. That’s why I’m telling you, don’t sweat the mistakes. I would be more concerned if you were regularly edging your man and he never, ever climaxed – if you’re not making mistakes, you’re not pushing him hard enough, he’s not at his true maximum pleasure, and you’re not doing it right.
A Trick To “Undo” Your Mistakes:
Once you’ve got a little experience (and a delightful mistake or two) behind you, then I suggest you add so-called “ruined orgasms” to the mix. A “ruined” orgasm is when you barely take him to point E (the point-of-no-return) then let go of his cock and cease all stimulation completely. His ejaculation reflex is irreversible, but the subsequent touchless orgasm is an intensely frustrating pale shadow of a real orgasm. Cum should leak from his dick, like it’s crying, rather than spurting out in powerful contractions.
Why would you do that to him? Well, first of all, I always remind people, “ruined” is just a name – your man is still having an orgasm, so don’t feel bad about it. And the benefits of ruined orgasms are plenty – so many, that they deserve their own separate #journal entry, which I’ll write later. The short answer, though, is that although there’s a physical release, it’s hormonally unsatisfying, so he stays horny and eager for more edging (or sex), right away. It’s basically a way of clicking the “Undo” button on your mistake.
Pretty cool, huh? Male anatomy is full of awesome, fun quirks like that!
So if you’re edging him slowly and carefully, you will still have time to make a choice when you realize you accidentally crossed his point-of-no-return: you can choose to finish the party and stroke him through a full orgasm; or you can immediately let go and ruin it – essentially hitting “Undo” because you want to keep playing. Your man will be insanely frustrated when you ruin him, but it will blow his mind when you go straight back to edging him again. Used this way, the ruined orgasm just becomes part of the night’s edging session, and your mistake is less of an issue. In the end, through a swirling haze of pleasure, he’ll realize what you did, and he’ll thank you for ruining him so the two of you could keep playing. (He knows that a full orgasm would have meant the premature end of an otherwise long, fun night)
After an accidental ruined orgasm, it might take a few minutes and a little extra work to get him back to the edge again. There is still a small hormonal release, followed by a very short, weak refractory period, even from a ruined orgasm – a matter of minutes, usually. Just let the cum finish dribbling from his untouched cock, then kiss him, pet him, talk to him, and soothe him for 2-5 minutes. Assure him that he did a great job, you find him super sexy, you enjoyed watching him leak for you, and you’re not done teasing him tonight. His erection should return, full strength and ready to go again, so quickly, I guarantee you will both be pleasantly surprised. Then go back to your regularly scheduled program: edge him like crazy.
If it wasn’t obvious already, if you make multiple mistakes, it’s okay to ruin him multiple times in one night. For example, I had a really “off” night one time with my husband – he was good, so I planned to reward him with an extra-long edging session, with like 30 edges. But on the very first edge, I pushed him too far and saw his orgasm reflex starting. I was disappointed, but I kept my tone happy and positive. I smiled and said, “Oops!” and immediately let go of his cock. After his cock was done crying, we cuddled and I promised him we were just getting started. I went back to work and, sure enough, I fucked up again, pretty much right away. But I never stopped smiling, acting like it was no big deal, “Oops!” I let go and ruined him again. We cuddled for a few minutes, I talked dirty in his ear, then we went back to it. Let’s just say, it was not my finest hour… I misread his body and ruined him four more times that night. I never got anywhere near the 30 edges that I wanted.
But guess what? It didn’t matter! My husband was soaked in sweat and cum, his balls were totally dry, and he was so delirious with pleasure and exhaustion that he couldn’t form a complete sentence. And he was STILL hard! It was so hot, I couldn’t resist – I climbed on top, fucked, and vibed myself to an awesome climax with his stiff, aching, empty cock inside me. It was one of our best nights, ever! And all because I made (six) mistakes and embraced those mistakes with a smile!
Edge your man HARD tonight! And if you make a mistake and he cums – it’s okay! It’s part of the experience!
❤️
☯️🛐
First of all thank you so much for taking the time to write this post @healthysexymarriage!
It’s such a HUGE relief, amidst the sea of so called experts the internet hosts, to find people who, I feel, not only understand what the whole tease-and-denial/edging catalogue is all about, but who also, and dare I say foremost, understand what sex and relationships, as a whole, are all about.
‘Mistakes’ do happen, indeed. They happen in the very same way that erotic intended touch has you bursting out with laughter because it tickles like hell. They happen in the same way like that excruciating toe cramp that completely ruins the mind-blowing orgasm you were three seconds away from having. They happen like that oh-my-god-let-the-earth-open-up-and-swallow-me-whole-fart that escapes at the worst moment, ever.
No man or woman is perfect. Therefor there is no such thing as ‘the perfect sex’ or ‘the perfect lover’.
Need I remind you that the ‘perfect sex’ you see in porn is severely edited? That even porn stars screw up every now and then?
I truly believe there’s no such thing as ‘mistakes’ between partners. No matter how long, or short, you have been together or how (in)experienced you are sex is a never ending journey. People change, our bodies change, our needs and desires shift or grow.
These ‘mistakes’ are to be treasured in the same way as a successful edging scene. Why I hear you ask. Because, regardless of it being a ‘ruined moment’ it remains a moment between you and your partner. Because, just like she wrote, by no means does it end your night/time together. Because even though he came too soon/unexpectedly, the reason he came is you. And with you I mean both you as his partner, as the relationship you both have.
I’m not an ounce ashamed to say that I actually enjoy the fuck out of these little mishaps. My babyboy has a way of curling up to me every time he cums, ruined or not, and I swear it never fails to do amazing things to me. Oh and babyboy, I know you’ll be reading this sooner or later, stop looking so damn smug now 😜
I want to dedicate this post to all my tease and denial/edging loving followers. Let this post help you along your own journey.
I am SO filled with mixed emotions. This pic is not really too realistic – but it will have to do. Mistress is about to “PUT” me outside. She has let me prepare this post – 6 – and then she is sending me outside to “edge” like the little sluts I am chatting with. Clearly like the little slut I am myself. “If you can’t keep your hands off your pussy until given permission – then you will “wait” outside on the patio while I do Post 7. May sure that EVERY time I glance over at you through the patio door – that you hand and clit are in close contact. And you MAY NOT CUM. Just edge yourself up into a frenzy.”
She knows I already in a frenzy. I can’t touch my clit for more than a minute at a time when I am like this.
So that is it for me i guess. Mistress will have post 7 for you and I will be edging out on the patio in plain view of anyone who happens to look my way. I am both SO tuned on right now -and fucking scared to death.
The following is a list of things that you should be doing. Not everything will apply in every case, and there may be things not on the list that work for you.
1. You must absolutely take total control of his orgasms!
• He must wear a chastity device. • You should lock is chastity and only you should be the “KeyHolder”. • Let him out at your discretion only and only for teasing or release.
2. Manage your feelings.
• Emphasize that he will never be permitted to have any kind of orgasm without your permission. • He must experience ruined orgasms. This emphasizes your control and stimulates his frustration.
3. Get into his head!
• Learn his fantasies and what turns him on. • Tease him with his fantasies whenever possible. • Find out what humiliates him. • Use his humiliation whenever possible.
4. You must keep him sexually aroused as much as possible.
• Taunt him. Dress sexy for someone other than him. Make sure he knows it! • Talk sexy and dirty to him. • Tell him you are going to make him do something humiliating. • Fondle him or let him fondle you. • Send him text messages with orders to do something sexual. • Make him give you orgasms frequently.
5. Make him do something humiliating and learn when he will do anything for you.
• Tease him to the edge then command the most humiliating activities. He will do them. • Make him wear a butt-plug for a time. • Train him to submit to your strapon. • Make him be naked when you are not. • Make him masturbate for you explaining his fantasies. Use these fantasies to taunt him. • Always, ALWAYS make him eat his own cum no matter where it is deposited.
6. Punish him whenever he displeases you.
• Don’t let him get away with anything! • Spank, paddle, or whip him. • Humiliate him in some way. • Make him do anything he hates.
7. No matter what you are doing, or where you are, find ways to taunt him.
• Fondle him through his pants in public (or in private). • Whisper sexy or humiliating things in his ear. • Make him shop for lingerie or toys for you and him.
Happy Fetish!
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Dec 16th – 2017 – Mistress is beginning to feel better….
She says Thank You to everyone who has been sending well wishes – and apologizes for not replying. She has not been up to it. I am sure you are curious; – best we can make of this sudden illness – she ate some bad food last Wednesday Night at some tacky after hours place. Like “WTF is she even doing in such a place?” She won’t talk about it at all – but I sense it was some kind of naughty little club she goes to about once a year. Last Wednesday was the night. So I got to be the one doing the “scolding” around here for a few days.
If all goes well. Mistress and I BOTH plan to be tending to the blog LIVE tomorrow Dec 17th – 2017 at 4PM Eastern Time Zone. USA.
Mistress will be able to post more info and answer messages at that time, assuming she continues to improve. Now IF you are going to lock yourself in Chastity – you are to BE LOCKED by tomorrow – at the date and time above. I will post instructions for my Chasity pets then. So yes, as this post says;
“Help fulfill my fantasies and close the lock:-)” Amy. XXX
PS – how does that sweat on my ass at the gym look to you? A note telling me might be nice. I bet it will look EVEN HOTTER as your chastity days start adding up! It would be appreciated if you would re-blog this post so others will know Mistress is on the mend. Thanks.
Mistress has a strict policy about cocks on her blog. They are NOT allowed. As you know she feels her blog is more “classy” and cocks are not at all “classy.” She also is not especially into chastity, although she respects those who like it – as she does of any fetish you are into. Mistress prefers men who will deny themselves because SHE TOLD them to. Not because some physical barrier is in the way – preventing them from touching.
BUT – I have a different feeling about chastity. I think EVERY COCK on the planet needs to be locked up just so I can relax around guys, not wondering when the next batch of filthy sperm will be thrown my way.
SO – Mistress has given me permission to put up this photo. If you are willing to put on your chastity cage for me – yes me me – Amy – then post a note saying you will be locked up for the special denial period that starts tomorrow.
UNDERSTAND – that your chastity instruction will come from me – Amy – NOT Mistress. In all likelihood you will have MUCH LESS access to touch. Yes you might be unlocked to edge a bit – but NOT at all as much as the other boi pets who remain unlocked and follow instructions from Mistress. And I am MUCH meaner than she is with this chastity thing. Sperm and cum disgusts me. So I would love nothing more than making sure your filthy juices stay inside you for as long as possible.
POST – your commitment to me to wear your cage as instructed in a note. Do it today. Once you do you will be locked tomorrow if you are not already. YOU – only have one day left.
Re-blog – I want as many cocks locked as possible. Well – I want EVERY cock locked really 🙂
You basically have two more days of freedom and then come Thursday the 14th. That’s it. We start your new life of denial from then until Christmas.
Tomorrow and Wednesday you will have to declare that you are fully committed in your submission to me. Some of you did that last week. That was just a tease. But over the next 48 hours or so – all of you will have to fall into line and take ME very seriously.
I am putting a lot of effort into preparing for your upcoming training – I expect YOU to do the same.
Re-blog this so as many edge toys as possible can follow my instructions.
Now study this photo. Feet – in heels but still bare which arouses you immensely. TIGHT BLACK Pants – such a fetish turn on – flawless body kept in shape by hard work – not by accident. And a pose so weakening for you – that your hand is already on your cock. Which is okay right now. It will NOT be okay on Thursday.
You will become weaker and more compliant than ever.
nfrdm 